Shilpa Shetty crap

Shilpa Shetty has been inundated with endorsement deals and film offers since winning Celebrity Big Brother. What’s next – her own perfume to rival Jade Goody’s?

It’s hard to believe that just over a month ago, most of us had never heard of Shilpa Shetty. The 31-year-old actress was already a major Bollywood star with £15million in the bank, but for the majority of the UK public, she was a nobody. The solution? Celebrity Big Brother was the leg-up Shilpa needed to ‘go Western’.

And obviously she has, winning over the masses with her dignified response to the bullying she received from CBB housemates Jade Goody, Jo O’Meara and Danielle Lloyd. Despite evidence to the contrary, Shilpa has refused to admit the bullying was racially motivated. In an interview with Sky news, she called Jade “aggressive, obnoxious at times, and yes, mannerless.” But she stopped short of calling the girls racist. “Me pulling them down is very easy. I don't want to do that because it brings down my class.” (Check out the English)

No doubt about it, Shilpa's a shrewd business woman who understands that there's no point harping on about Celebrity Big Brother when she should be concentrating on her next goal – to become a world renown movie star. After all, practically the first thing Shilpa said on leaving the house was "I don't mind moving to England."

Shilpa’s first public appearance since winning CBB was at the premiere of Music And Lyrics, Hugh Grant’s new film. Is it mere coincidence that rumours are linking the actress to Hugh’s next film? And what about the whispers that she will star in a Hollywood movie with Johnny Depp? Ever the diplomat, all Shilpa would say was: “My ideal co-star would be a mixture of Hugh Grant and Johnny Depp.” She did concede that a move to the UK is likely. “With the way it's going, I think I'm going to be spending a lot of time here.”

Shilpa’s first move after winning Celebrity Big Brother was to sign top UK publicist Max Clifford, whose previous clients include the Beatles, Mohamed al-Fayed, and Rebecca Loos at the height of her alleged affair with David Beckham. Clifford says Shilpa has been inundated with offers. “Often it’s just as important what you turn down as to what you agree to do, ” he said. “For Shilpa it’s a very exciting time.” (No fucking shait!)

Below are some rumoured endorsements and offers that Shilpa is considering:

• A role in The Kumars at No. 42
• Hosting a cricket show (think ‘Cricket Idol’), which has already been a huge success in India
• Starring roles in films opposite Johnny Depp and Hugh Grant
• A Bollywood movie based on her CBB experience
• Ad campaigns for 15 companies including cosmetics and travel endorsements
• The release this week of a compilation album, A Bollywood Dream, featuring hits from her movies, despite the fact that she mimes in her films

• Interest from UK record labels even though Shilpa admits she can’t sing
• Fronting her own cosmetics range. Surely a perfume to rival Jade’s wouldn’t be far behind?

That’s not including payment for Celebrity Big Brother, reports of £300,000 for interviews with UK media, and negotiations for a further £200,000 for interviews with international press. Surely after all that, Hollywood stardom is a sure thing. And, of course, there’s every star’s trump card, a tell-all biography. Expect Shilpa’s story to hit stores by the summer with the paperback just in time for Christmas.

But still there’s more – Shilpa met Tony Blair and senior ministers at Prime Minister’s question time in the Commons this week, and is set to meet Queen Elizabeth at a reception on Commonwealth Day on March 12. Queen Shilpa, more like! (Accha, last line hai!)